Donna's Plan
by Hannah14NZ
Summary: Donna feels empty. She's sick of empty rooms, her empty life and constantly busy work schedule where she works 24/7 so she decides to change her fate.
1. Chapter 1

Donna's P.O.V

Gazing around my beautiful New York apartment I can't help but know that I am lucky. Lucky to be here, lucky to have lived the life that I live, but most of all lucky to have had my life turn out the way it has. By no means did I grow up dirt poor but nor did I grow up wealthy. I would put myself straight in the middle, but that has changed over the past fifteen years. I'm no longer the struggling actress trying to make it on Broadway nor am I the dirt-poor legal secretary at the District Attorneys office, I'm better than that now. I'm Donna Roberta Paulsen personal secretary to Harvey Specter. I've been Harvey's secretary for nearly fifteen years, we became 'friends' in the District Attorney's office but after one night of shared passion as lovers we moved on to become friends and work equals. Harvey knows that he couldn't be himself without me, but I'm also aware of how much I rely on Harvey too. He gets me out of tough jams where I think I've made the correct call but instead it's far from the correct way to go about things. But now after all these years I'm no longer fulfilled, I feel empty.

I don't know what exactly I feel that I am missing but I know that it's something that my body yearns for. Starting around at the modern setting of the room I can't help but picture a dog or even a cat, but deep down I know that's not what I'm missing. Frowning I turn to the coffee pot on the kitchen counter and I wonder if I'm not craving someone in my life. Shaking my head as I drink from the coffee with the splash of vanilla in it, I know I need to think this through some more. But at the same time, maybe I don't need to think it through I just need to accept it so that I can talk about it. Turning away from the kitchen I move to the bedroom to start my day with a shower and then make my way to work. Waltzing down the hallway my robe billowing behind me I step into my lavender coloured room, the modern nature makes me feel instantly at ease, but it also makes me aware of how feminine my life has become and how uninviting it must look to a man.

A rough attempt at shaking off the nagging feeling of emptiness has me moving towards the massive rain shower I had installed in my bathroom. The water pressure and combined heat from the shower instantly puts me at ease and the pressure that I feel has instantly drained from my body. A quick final rinse has me moving from the shower into my massive closet and selecting the perfect dress to start the day. Choosing a burgundy Dior dress that slips over and fits just right under my bust has me smiling at my reflection as I know that I look just right. With a final gloss of lipstick and a nod to myself in the mirror I know that I'm ready to start my day. The instant I step out of my apartment and into the hallway I know that I've timed my exit wrong. My neighbour Mrs Lix is taking her children out to school, "good morning miss Donna," the eldest one Matt states before grabbing his backpack and pushing past me. Louise Lix also steps into the hallway with her youngest two, Missy who has just started school and her baby who I'm yet to meet. "Morning Donna," Louise states, adjusting the baby on her hip and organising Missy who is still only little. I barely hear her as I'm too infatuated by the baby. My body feels warm suddenly I'm clammy, I have no idea why I'm so infatuated by her but I am. "Are you okay Donna?" Louise questions moving closer but I'm still looking at the baby. Shaking myself from my own daydreams I nod at Louise, "yes I'm fine. I didn't know you guys had three now. Who's this little cutie?" I question holding my finger out to the baby who takes it willingly and holds tight. "Oh yeah, she's about 5 months old now, her names Ana." I nod at Louise and smile before taking my finger back from the baby and bidding goodbye, very aware of the fact that I'm still tingling all over and as I climb into the back of a taxi it hits me. I want a baby.


	2. Chapter 2

Donna's P.O.V

I feel like I'm in a dream. Today has been going less than well for me. My brain has been filled with the thought of babies, but I have no idea where it's come from. "..onna…Donna…Donna!" A file is slammed down on my desk making me jump in shock. "What!" I state leaping up from my chair and starting blankly into Harvey's eyes which instantly widen in shock. "Are you okay?" Harvey questions staring at me and I settle into my seat again before grabbing the file and nodding at him. "Yes…I'm fine do you need something?" I question grabbing the file and squaring it up on my desk.  
"No I was just calling out to you for a few minutes…" Harvey states questioning me with his eyes but I quickly move on and tell him I'll make the copies he requires when I look at the file in my hands. I don't even look back as I leave my chair and head to the file room to make the copies. But I forgot about one little thing, I left Harvey at my cubicle, the same cubicle that I had been searching IVF facilities at this morning.

Harvey's P.O.V

I watch Donna sashay away from her cubicle, but I'm still really confused over her actions in the past thirty seconds. Never in our entire time that we've worked together has Donna ever sat at her desk and ignored me calling to her, regardless of whether she had been listening to my conversations or not. Twiddling the pen in my hands I decided that I should probably go back to my office because I know if I try to peak around Donna's cube and touch things in her space, she will be less than impressed with me. With a deep breath I step away but as I do the twiddling that I had been doing with my pen slips from my hand and lands in Donna's cube. "Fuck…" I state glancing at the pen resting on Donna's keyboard, a quick look towards the file room tells me that I've probably got time to quickly grab the pen.

Zipping around her cube and grabbing my pen I don't even glance at her desk or move any of her things but I do look at her computer screen expecting to see my calendar up on the screen I'm really confused and shocked when I see the screen in front of me. 'New York Fertility'. My head whips around behind me to check how far away Donna is, still not seeing her I watch as my hand moves towards the mouse and I have a quick look at the website. "Harvey, what are you doing?" My mouth instantly goes dry as I spin around and see Donna standing there with the copies I asked for. I can feel my mouth opening and shutting but all I can see is the look on Donnas face and I instantly know I've fucked up massively. "Is there no such thing as privacy anymore Harvey?" Donna questions stepping towards me and tossing the copies at my chest. I grab them and sidestep her. "I was only grabbing my pen…and then, and then I…well I wasn't snooping I was just looking…" I state looking at her as she steps forward and gets rid of the website before grabbing her handbag and moving towards me. "I hope that you don't mind if I leave early, but I uhm…" Donna trails off looking at me, I take a step towards her but she turns quickly and leaves for the elevator.

I move towards my office and for the first time in ages, I shut the door. Placing the copies on the table I sit down on the couch and look back out at Donnas now empty cubicle. "Shit," I state under my breath as I lean back and for the first time in nearly twelve years I think about that one night that Donna and I shared. The night that made me think about the future but then I was a dick and offered her a job working for me, which I knew would force her to ask me to forget that night happened. But I'll never forget it, how can I forget about the one woman who ruined me for anyone else. But now, thinking about what she had on her computer I can't help but wonder if she is moving on now but that even raises questions, questions that I never thought would ever worry me. Staring at the copies on the table I can't help but wonder why Donna looking to have children, or being curious makes me wish I was making those decisions too.


	3. Chapter 3

Donna's P.O.V

Rushing out of Pearson Spector Litt before lunchtime was not my finest move, but nor was leaving New York Fertility up on my computer screen and leaving my cubicle. The thought of babies has never been on my mind and that's why it's confusing and shocking me that I care so much about wanting one now. 'Get out of your own head Paulsen,' I think as I shake my head and attempt to move past the idea of a baby. But something makes me pause at the exit of the building, I know right now that Harvey is upstairs in his office either pacing or completely spaced out at the thought that I, Donna Paulsen want's a baby. He is spaced out because in the twelve years that we've known each other I've never even mentioned wanting a family or a baby for that matter. But I can't focus on Harvey right now, I need to focus on what I want to do. So I reach for my phone that's buried in my handbag.

Dialling the number my hands shake but as I bring it to my ear a new confidence emerges, "Manhattan Clinic, how may I help you?" My breathing hitches but I hold off on the urge to vomit, "Hi, Donna Paulsen just wanting to make an appointment to see doctor Rogers as soon as possible." The receptionist types away, "one moment Ms Paulsen…" the pause in her voice is the worst, "…Ms Paulsen we can do this afternoon at 4:00pm or tomorrow at 10:00am…otherwise Doctor Rogers is away for two weeks…" I pause and look at my watch, it's already 2:00pm now. With a shaky breath I say, "this afternoon would be great, I'll see you in a little while." The receptionist agrees and we part with a cherry goodbye on her end. Returning my phone to my handbag I glance around the lobby of our building and decide that I deserve lunch.

Waltzing my way towards the nearest café, I'm stopped almost immediately by a tall gentleman, "…excuse me and my rudeness but aren't you Donna Paulsen of Pearson, Spector, Litt?" I nod and he bounds straight up to me and holds out his hand, "I'm Tom Shields and you're legendary. My face blushes a little but I'm not convinced, "oh so do you work at the DA, who's your supervisor?" His face goes a little white, as if he's nervous and then he finally stutters,  
"I'm not from the DA's office, I'm from floor 46. I work with Benjamin your computer guy." I nod and look at him before I say, "Okay, so what do you want with me?" I question looking at him but also looking across the street longing to be able to eat. "Benjamin sent me, he said it's important and that I need Donna, and Louis said you had run out. So here I am," I nod and look at him,

"Is it important or can it wait?" Tom looks at his watch and then states,  
"It can wait." I nod and move away to start walking towards the café and as I do, I shout over my shoulder, "Good. Tell Benjamin I'll see him bright and early tomorrow." Tom nods and within ten minutes I'm all over my chicken salad.

Walking into Manhattan Clinic I'm not nervous but I'm a little on edge. To most people that would sound like I'm nervous, but I'm Donna and I'm awesome! Registering my name and taking out my phone I look at my messages for the first time since leaving the building. Noticing nothing urgent I go to put it away but I'm stopped by it vibrating in my hand and Harvey's dumb face pops up. Bracing myself I answer the call. "Har.."

"Stop it Donna, where the hell are you?" I gulp but look around to make sure no one is close to me, that could possibly hear Harvey yelling down the line. "I'm at the doctors Harvey, what do you need?" I hear his steps slow and he repeats.

"Doctors, are you alright?" I smile a little at the concern that it in his voice.  
"Yes I'm fine, I just need to have a check-up, for my future plans." He scoffs,

"Your future plans, do you mean your plans to have a baby but not tell anyone, even your friends?" I blink and make eye contact with the receptionist who is quick to look away. "Yes Harvey, a check-up for my plans to have a baby. Would I have told people? Yes, when the time was right. But you snooped at my desk and found it by accident. I want this Harvey and if you can't stand behind me after all the times, I've stood by you, then what the hell does our friendship mean?" As I raise that question Doctor Rogers emerges and gestures me to follow her. "I gotta go Harvey, bye." I state without waiting for him to finish whatever he wanted to say.

Sitting in a paper gown on this table is the scariest thing I've ever had to do. After a fifteen-minute discussion about my plans Doctor Rogers stated that I needed to do physical and that she would do an ultrasound to be sure everything was all well with my body and that I'd be able to carry a child. We've done all the normal tests of blood pressure, weight, height and so forth but now I'm nervous about the ultrasound. Lying on my back as Doctor Rogers comes back in, I can't help but panic if she sees that I can't have kids, what would I do then? But as the doctor comes back, I can't help but wonder if I should be doing this alone, but at the same time loads of New York women have babies, and most are probably alone so I'm thinking that I'll be okay. "Well Donna everything looks really good, I'd say you have a high chance of conceiving with IVF treatment, so please contact your fertility service and they can request these results from us, but you can expect to be good to go straight away." I nod and thank her very much, she nods and goes to leave but not before sticking her head back in and saying, "oh and your husband is out in the reception waiting for you." She's gone before I can even retaliate to what she has said.


	4. Chapter 4

Donna's P.O.V:

Dressing as quickly as I can, I grab my handbag and belongings in a rush. I'm so nervous to open the door and see what is on the other side waiting in the reception, my gut tells me that it's Harvey. Glancing at my phone I know he would've had enough time to make it to the doctors from work but another smaller part of me is hoping it's not Harvey. I don't want to have to explain myself, I don't want him to ask me why and I don't want to give him the real reason. The reason that I won't give anyone else, I'm lonely. I, Donna Roberta Paulson am lonely and instead of looking for comfort in a man, I am choosing to look for comfort in raising a small family. A family of two.

With a final glance at my reflection in the mirror in the room I breathe in and out before leaving, stepping back to reception I wave to the receptionist and make my way towards the door, already seemingly having forgotten what the doctor had told me about my "husband". "Donna Paulson!" I pause and spin around coming face to face with Louis Litt. My eyebrows raise what feels like a foot off my head. "Louis what are you doing here?" I question looking at the man and how comfortable he looks at a doctor. "Well I'm here to support you Donna, I heard you on the phone with Harvey, so I came down, but I had to be a family member, so I said I was your husband." My shoulders drop and I breathe out what I take to be a sigh of relief that it's not Harvey, but on some small scale I think I'm a little disappointed. "I appreciate that Louis, but I'm fine. I'm on my way back to work now so you wasted a trip." Louis stands and places the women's bridal magazine back on the table and says, "perfect let's go together, my driver is out front." I nod and gather my things closer to me, breathing out a sigh of relief that he doesn't know why I'm here. I think if he did, he would be asking me all kinds of questions.

The drive back to the firm is quiet from my side but nosy from Louis' side, he chats about everything from his romance with Shelia to his latest excursion to mudding. Arriving back to the firm I bid goodbye to Louis and head to the local coffee cart. The coffee cart guy looks at me and says, "Ms Paulson, your regular?" I shake my head and look at the menu.  
"No not from now on, let me get a mixed berry tea." He nods and sets about making it for me. Within a few minutes it's complete and he hands it to me, I thank him and move back down the street towards the firm. Pausing I lift the lid and blow on the tea, I know it's not coffee but if I'm going to have a baby, I'm going to do it all out. Healthy and no coffee, or minimal coffee. The ride back upstairs makes me nervous because I don't know whether to expect Harvey there or not, if he is I can only hope that he doesn't want to continue the discussion on the phone because I'm really not in the mood.

The doors open onto Specter Litt and I walk out, I spot Gretchen and give her a wave, she waves back, and I make my way towards my cubical. I can spot Harvey in his office, but I ignore him and walk straight to my desk. Settling my tea down I make my way into his office to see if he needs anything. "Harvey?" He looks up at me from his desk and his eyes rake over me, I shiver without realising it. "Donna, your back. I hope all is well," I nod and rake my eyes over him, noticing the tousled hair and loosened tie. 'He's nervous or stressed' I think as my eyes come back to rest on him. "Yeah, it's fine, was just a check. Do you need something?" Harvey shakes his head and returns back to his files; I nod and move away from him to go to my cubicle but as I do he calls out. "Donna, I need a table tonight anywhere you think is good." I nod and move to leave again but once more I'm stopped, "hey make it whatever time you want as well. We're getting dinner tonight, and don't tell me you've got a date or audition because I checked your schedule while you were out." I nod and feeling slightly dazed I leave Harvey and move to my desk. Picking up the phone I book a table at a local Italian place. They serve good pasta and chicken parmesan so I know we will love it there. I send an email to confirm it to Harvey and then continue with my work nervous about what is to come.

Harveys P.O.V

The phone call with Donna and hearing her tell me that she is at the doctors getting a check-up makes me nervous, nervous because for the first time in years probably since I was in college, I feel like I'm losing someone. I'm losing Donna and I don't know how to feel about it. Within a year Donna could be a mother, and if she is a mother she won't be working here and I won't see her every day. Her days will be full of her baby son or daughter, watching them grow and loving them. She will forget all about us at Spector Litt and that thought tears me apart. So instead of rushing off to see her at the doctors I choose to stay at work. I heard a shuffling outside the door of my office and I see the tail-end of Louis Litt disappearing and I just let it happen. I need to decide how I am going to convince Donna that I want to help her. That her having a baby doesn't have to mean her doing it alone. I need her to know that I want to help her, no that I need to help her.


	5. Chapter 5

Donna's P.O.V

Walking home I'm full of nerves about tonight. I can't help but wonder why he wants us to get dinner, this is very rare compared to our yearly dinners to celebrate our anniversary together. But this is very different. I can't ignore that I have dropped a massive bomb on Harvey but he really can't want to discuss my desire to have a baby so it must be something else entirely. Walking through my front door and laying down my coat, purse and kicking my shoes aside I make my way to the bathroom to shower and get ready. Turning on the water to the right temperature I strip of my dress of the day and cast it onto my chair in my bedroom with the other four dresses of the week. I intend on taking them to the dry cleaner this weekend. Stepping back into the bathroom I cast a look at the full mirror before stepping into the shower, one look at myself in the mirror and I can't help but wonder what will happen if I go ahead and choose to have a baby. I know that I will grow and get bigger, but I can't help but imagine that I'd look amazing with a baby bump, because at the end of the day I'm Donna and I'm awesome.

Harvey's P.O.V

Waltzing into my apartment I cast my key onto the counter and walk to pour myself a drink. Grabbing my scotch, I take a drink as I grab my phone from my inside pocket. Checking emails, I see one from Donna confirming dinner at the Italian place round the road from her place. I see she made the booking for 9 o'clock and glancing at my phone I see it's nearly 8 o'clock. Downing my drink, I take a deep breath and head for the shower. Taking time to cast my suit jacket aside and loosening my tie I step into the wardrobe area to decide on an outfit for tonight. Thumbing through my suits I know Donna will look stunning, and therefore I also need to look amazing because all people will see when they look at us is power…well at least that's what I hope to make people think. Quickly choosing my grey suit knowing the eyes that Donna always gives me when I wear that one, I choose to forgo the tie tonight and leave it open collared. Glancing at my watch I see it's 8.15pm and I know if I want to shower, I need to get going.

Stepping out of the shower after a quick rinse off I can't help but think about how amazing this dinner is going to be. Dressing and quickly calling Ray to meet me downstairs I spend the ten minutes of driving time on my phone. Quickly searching up IVF treatment so I can have something to discuss with Donna tonight I learn a lot about why people choose it, even couples sometimes do IVF if they struggle to have children so I can't fault Donna on wanting the best for herself. "We're here Harvey…" I look up and outside at the restaurant,

"Thanks Ray, hey head home I'll catch a cab." He nods and I leave and enter the restaurant. Walking up to the host I say, "Harvey Specter, table for two. Could be booked under Donna Paulsen too." She nods and shifts through her stuff before saying, "yes there was a booking, but it was cancelled about thirty minutes ago sir. I'm really sorry." My mouth drops a little but then I say,  
"That's okay I must have my wires crossed. Thanks for your time." Turning and leaving I grab my phone and dial Donna. Like I expected she doesn't answer, thankfully I still remember where she lives. I've only been a handful of times into her apartment, but I've picked her up with Ray before. Setting off on my adventure it takes me less than twenty minutes to walk there.

Reaching her door I'm suddenly aware that I don't have a key, seeing the call up box on the outside of the building I scan down until I see her name, 206 D. Paulsen. I choose her neighbour 209 R. Yancy. I know that she gets on with all her neighbours but I doubt they've ever heard her talk about her life or me, pressing the buzzer I'm shocked when an elderly ladies voice answers. "Yes, who is it?"  
"Oh I'm so sorry. My name is Harvey Specter. I'm a collegue of Donna Paulsen in 206. I was hoping to surprise her, but I don't have a key…" I'm shocked when I am interrupted and the voice states,  
"Yes, I know who you are Mr Specter. Tell me one thing," I nod and then agree vocally as the voice states, "will you take care of our Donna?"  
"Our Donna?" I question as the woman laughs,  
"Yes our Donna, she's been living her for fifteen years…so yes Mr Specter, she's our Donna." I laugh and remember the Donna of the past. The vibrant red head with bangs who talked her way onto my desk. I love and continue to love that Donna. "Yes I will take care of our shared 'Donna'," there is a pregnant pause before I hear the buzz of the door.

Bounding up the stairs because her building does not have an elevator which is insane for the height of the heels that woman wears. Walking up to 206 I'm suddenly at a loss of words. What on earth can say to the woman I've loved for more than a decade. I was hoping to use the dinner to tell her how I felt but she bailed on me. Raising my hand and knocking on the door I hear a rustling noise and then Donna answers the door. Her face looks slightly flushed and I can tell almost instantly that she is a bit nervous that I'm there. "Hey what happened to the restaurant, they told me you cancelled?" She nods nervously and then I hear another voice, "who is that Donna?" I watch her eyes go wide and I can feel a frown settling across my face. Who is in Donna's apartment?


	6. Chapter 6

This chapter will be shorter. Some 'guest' commenters have mentioned that my timeline is hard to follow. Well this story is not set to a Suits timeline, this is my own timeline but it uses the Suits franchise.

Harvey's P.O.V

"Who is that Donna?" I watch as Donna's eyes go wide and she turns around and I get a glimpse into her apartment and I see exactly who spoke those words. I can feel my own eyes grow wide as my eyes fall on one Roberta Paulsen and then slightly behind her are two more Paulsen's, her father Jim and sister, Charlotte. "Oh Harvey, hi dear…" I grin and Donna groans, but I swear I'm the only one to hear her. "Hello Roberta, how are you?" She smiles and comes in for a hug which I willingly give her. "Oh we just called in. Jim had a business meeting down here in the city so we thought that we would call in, caught our Donna in the midst of leaving for a hot date." I smile and say,  
"Oh really, what makes you say it was a date Roberta?" Roberta smiles and says,

"Well how else Harvey, she was wearing her satin blue dress. She looked a million bucks." I grin and avoid contact with Donna, it's not a shock that Donna knows that I love her in blue. "Well it sure sounds that way doesn't it Mrs Paulsen." I then glance at Donna and see her wearing gym leggings and a massive hoodie. I love work Donna but home Donna is even better. "Well I should go, I just wanted to check in. Goodnight all." I state backing away from the door, Donna is about to say goodbye when I hear Charlotte say, "well invite the poor man in mama, he is after all the big date Donna was going on…" My mouth goes dry and Donna spins to give her sister the death glare. I watch as Roberta eyes both girls then looks back at me and then a glimmer in her eye. "Of course, please do come and join us Harvey." I look at Donna who looks at her feet and then turns to face her family and walks inside. "Of course Harvey, this is my place but please do as my family wish." I chuckle and follow her, shutting the door behind me and removing my shoes. I turn and see her sister looking at me. "What she hates shoes in the house."

"Uhuh, and how would you know that Specter, aren't you just her boss." I feel my ears heat up and I turn away from her and go straight to Donna's kitchen for scotch.

Searching the top cupboard where it normally is I hear Donna shout, it's under the sink. I nod and grab the bottle and the scotch glasses that I gave her when we moved back from the D.A's office. "Donna, the glasses?" I hear her scramble and then she is in her kitchen with me. Pulling them out of the pantry shelf and handing them to me. "Harvey?" I look at her and she quietens her voice, "I'm going to tell them," I look at her,  
"Tell them, what have you decided to go ahead?" She looks at me with that knowing look and I know that she has. "Yes Harvey, I have and I thought that you of all people would've supported me." I'm left gobsmacked as she heads back to her parents. I know that it's like an open ended opportunity for me to leave but I don't want to. I want to be there and support her, even if she doesn't know it yet.

Donna's P.O.V

Leaving Harvey in my kitchen with the knowledge that I'm about to drop on my parents that I intend to use IVF in order to become a mother. I know that Harvey probably does not accept or support my decision but I'm almost forty and I can no longer afford to sit around and wait for the man of my dreams to sweep me off my feet. Walking back and sitting down I look at my parents and say, "guys I need to tell you all something," they turn and face me as I quickly say.  
"Well I need to tell you about a massive part of my life that I've chosen," they all wait with baited breath as I say, "I am…" but then I'm interrupted as Harvey comes and sits next to me and lays his hand on my leg, making my eyes go wide but he's not focused on me, he's focused on my family and that's when he drops it, the mother of all bombs. "You see Jim and Roberta, Donna and I, we're going to have a baby together. We're gonna be parents."


End file.
